The Grieving Heart

When grief is so great You cannot recognize the grief of others 

You become isolated and blinded 

When your heart is shattered into thousands of pieces because of your loss 

You cannot see the broken pieces of other hearts around you 

Your vision has turned inward preventing you from ever seeing their pain 

When you push away the hearts closest to you 

Those who love you dearly and want desperately to comfort you 

To take away your pain 

It hurts 

When your heart is inconsolable 

They grant you grace and retreat 

As they try to understand your bitter grief and tremendous loss 

Still Their tears flow along side yours and well up in pools of grief that drown their intended purpose 

So those closest to you withdraw 

To quietly and prayerfully grieve over your bitterly grieving heart 

And to commit you to the hands of Our Heavenly Father To comfort you and give you peace 

And to ask for the healing of their broken hearts

 Time Passes

Time passes

And takes with it my pain 

The breathtaking pain of grief 

That lingers 

But finally fades into yesterday

Tears that once flowed continuously 

Slow day by day

To flowing less frequently 

But still never stop

Always the reminders 

Are in everything 

The smell 

The memory 

The glimpse of a shadow 

The space occupied 

Now empty 

Time passes

And takes with it my pain

When I’m no more

No tears

When my memory joins yours

 The Pain Revisits

The pain revisits

When I watch a sad movie

The loss of a loved one revisits and is

Never forgotten 

The loss is relived everyday 

Every night

It’s the sudden, unexpected loss

That replays over and over

As comfort and peace try to

Elude the grasp

Of the bearer

To torture the soul

But God’s mercy intervenes

To grant hope everlasting 

 Who Holds My Tomorrow 

Who holds my future 

Where will I land

In whose hands will I fall

Independence has lost its grasp

As my eyes grow dim

In whose hands hold my days

As my dreams fade away 

Who will care if I fail this life

Or leave unannounced 

To cross over yonder

To the promised land

And seek its beauty beyond

A burden I’ve become 

Unintentional, and yet 

To depend upon offspring 

Is today my beget 

Shorten my days I pray 

For mercy I request 

To meet my maker soon

To see the one 

Who holds my tomorrow 

With no regrets I shall go 

Our World Stopped

 Our World Stopped

When you were taken away, we cried. 

Devastation shrouded our lives

As we tried to understand why. 

The “why” eludes us as we try to grasp the reason and our own purpose. 

Time stood still when we learned of your passing, yet time continued on. 

You are now a memory sealed in our hearts and kept alive with our smiles, laughter… and tears… as we recall significant events and milestones of your life. 

The heartache of losing you is tremendous, and we wonder at our own survival. 

In the wake of your death are many who loved you, and love you still, who are drowning in grief as we learn to celebrate your life and learn to live on without you. The pain is unbearable and breathtaking. 

Until we meet again in the sky, the great beyond, our heavenly home, we will choose life, one day at a time, and rely on God to carry us during our disabled state, a state of confusion and disbelief. 

Love and support help us cope, even so, the hole created by your absence is great and cannot be filled. Your memories will have to suffice until we are able to join you. Until then, we are missing you. 

Fran Hopkins O’Rourke 

2021

Written for and dedicated to my son David O’Rourke in memory of the passing of his son Braden O’Rourke. 

Braden O’Rourke

9/5/2001

4/10/2021

Leprechaun's Deceipt

The rainbow is God's promise
not a path that leads astray
to pots of gold and empty promises
that are soon to fade away

For such things are for the foolish
who chase false hopes and empty dreams
for Leprechaun deceives them
and preys upon their greed

In their search of gold and happiness
to this end they will receive
only grief and disappointment
not the treasure that they seek

Francene Hopkins
Copyright 3-17-2004

The Mask--Her Persona

Have you seen her without her mask--her persona?
The pain-filled lines of age lying underneath from years of failed relationships?

Her downcast eyes with an overflow of tears she cannot contain when no one is looking her way?
Her broken heart, pieced back together like a puzzle, that once held love but dares not trust again for fear of shattering?

Do you care? Do you really care?
Or are you content to view the mask--the persona--she portrays to fool all who surround her but do not know her?

Have you heard her laugh, a laugh too loud to deafen the screams of her heart?
Have you noticed she tries too hard to please the undeserving people around her to earn the recognition she craves?
Have you seen the loyalty expressed to so-called friends who could care no less for her efforts?
Have you observed the goodness of her spirit when others are in need?

Do you care? Do you really care?
Or are you content to view the the mask--the persona--she portrays to fool all who surround her but do not know her?

Francene Hopkins
Copyright 7/22/2023

Butterflies and Flowers

Butterflies and Flowers

Butterflies and flowers

Gliding and flowing to gentle breeze

Her countenance as roses in continuous bloom

Sending sweet aroma to tease

Her beautiful eyes consume all

As her precious heart seizes

All who surround her

Butterflies and flowers

Dancing gleefully through the air

Love as generous raindrops

Gentle showers

Curiosity, desirous freedom lending to flight

Mounting hopeful preservation of family

The one with blue eyes and flowing blonde hair

Seeking justice; patiently awaiting final judgment

Restoration

Butterflies and Flowers

To whom God's favor flows

A lovely and precious mother

wife

sister, daughter

A blessing so generously bestowed

And carefully placed close to our hearts

To share

To love

To protect and preserve unity

Harmony

Francene Hopkins

1-16-2014 (c)

Revised 1-17-2014

Written for and dedicated to my daughter, Lisa Michelle O'Rourke Pilant

The Window you have Opened

The Window you have Opened

You have given but a small window
To look into your life.
Yet I long to be a part
To share
To give and receive love
To swell my heart with pride
Standing beside you
Rejoicing your accomplishments.

But I peek through the small portal of your life
The window you have opened
Awaiting a door so I may enter
Awaiting …while I watch as days go by
As you pass from childhood to adulthood.

Francene Hopkins
November 17, 2012 ©

Brown Dog

Brown Dog

He had been driven on down the road

His coat was matted; I could see his bones

He was starving, and he moaned

I wondered how long Brown Dog had roamed

Eyes full of fear; a look so sad

His tail was tucked between his legs

Would I let him stay?

Would I drive him on?

How could his Master dump him here?

A pet so loyal . . . man’s best friend!

Only a monster could inflict such pain

On one so trusting and so tame

I could drive him farther on

It’s not my fault he has no home

I patted his head and talked to him

I asked him where he’d been

I fed him and let him lie

  on the porch; I went inside

Francene Hopkins
1994 (Copyright)

Life's Adverse Weather

Life's Adverse Weather

We embrace . . . I feel your touch

  my heart leaps with glee!

I don’t care what we do

  so long as we’re together

Hand-in-hand and heart-to-heart

Through life’s adverse weather

When storm clouds gather

You’re my shield . . . my protector

You’ll take care of me

Our lives to forever share

Heart and soul as we will travel

Through life’s adverse weather

Francene Hopkins

2/6/1996 (c)

Starting Over

Starting Over

I'll pack old sorrows; place them on a shelf

sort my memories; shed last tears

and cast aside useless fears

I'll keep sweet memories and hang them high

freshen sweet dreams to brighten my sky

and place them well within my reach.

I'll wear reality, standing tall and proud

put on my smile; throw away my frown

and face tomorrow so clear now to see.

I'll lay out my plans one by one

hold on to friendships as I move on

and thank God above I've come so far--starting over

Francene Hopkins

12/7/1996

Tears that Never Dry

Tears that Never Dry

No greater pain can parents bear

Than passing from life their child

No greater grief, no reasons why

Their broken hearts scream, "It isn't right!"

For his path to end and leave behind

Tears that never dry

With grief they could hardly bear

God directs their footsteps on

As memories reflected

Memories shared

They laugh and cry

Tears that never dry

God comforts their hearts

Assuring one day

reunion with their son

For knowing Heaven is his home

They cling to precious memories

And cry happy

Tears that never dry

Their beloved has departed to his heavenly home

Where God and angels reside

Comfort and peace there abide

With pain no more

His tears God shall dry

Francene Hopkins
November 2013 (c)

Written for and dedicated to Mike and Donna Gomez
For the passing of their son
Daniel Gomez
November 3, 1964
November 2, 2013

One of these Days

One of these days

One of these days, I'll be able to sing
And I'll know all the words
I'll sing praises The Lord
One of these days
When I'm homeward bound
I'll sing with angels on high
I'll sing praiss to The Lord

Francene Hopkins
January 2013 (c)

You Travel to Places of Time already Spent

You Travel to Places of Time already Spent

I love to hear you laugh and see your smile
But laughter and smiles are becoming few and far between
As you travel to places of time already spent
To visit younger faces who reside there.

I await your return to me

to this place of time

to time yet to spend
On rough roads with many curves,

potholes, and dark crevices

you travel
wondering aimlessly

as I await

helplessly

If I could travel with you

to hold your hand

to guide you
to safety guide you

to where I am

I would
But where you go

I cannot follow

So I await your return

If only for short visits
For you are

my love

my life

my wife

I love to hear you laugh and see your smile

Francene Hopkins
2013 (c)
Revised 5/28/2014 (Copyright)

Written for and dedicated to my brother
for his wife who has dementia.

My Hero

My Hero

You were the strongest man

With arms of steel and vice-grip hands;

You are my Dad and my Friend . . .

My Hero

I would swing from your arms;

You would lift me off the floor.

My friends all looked up to you;

For me there was nothing you wouldn’t do.

You gave me time, and I knew

I could always count on you . . .

My Hero

Now that you’re Eighty-Three,

You’re still a giant to me.

I want you to know you’ll always be . . .

My Hero

Francene Hopkins

1994 (c)

Black Cloud Overhead

Black Cloud Overhead

The black cloud overhead

filled with lightning bolts of trouble
is a swirling tornado
that has chosen him to follow.

Lightning strikes the path he chooses
and burns every bridge he crosses.
The tornado wind left traces
of anger upon his face.

Now trouble touches all around him
damaging structures that once stood firm
slamming doors that once were open
and twisting friendships now forsaken.

He's facing yet another river
and wonders now how he'll cross over.
The bridge he burned still smolders,
and he wonders who will rebuild it.

He sees the black cloud overhead
with its lightning bolts of trouble
hurling its tornado wind toward him
and asks

"Why have you chosen me to follow?"

The black cloud looks down on him
with a menacing, mocking grin
swirling trouble all around him
and says

"That's for you to figure out!"

Francene Hopkins

2000 (c)

Crystal Heart

Crystal Heart

My crystal heart could not hold onto your love

For when you left, it shattered, creating a crystal cascade

And like water from a broken glass, your love just flowed away.

Francene Hopkins

March 20, 1996 (c)

Ol' Betsy

Ol’ Betsy

“Ol’ Betsy,” that’s what Daddy called her:

His ‘49 Ford pickup truck.

Dark green body and standard shift,

We rode ‘round town without a miss.

Far from home we would travel,

Dad and Mom and me and Brother.

Arriving in a stately fashion--

We followed the jobs of Daddy’s union

Remember camping under a tall oak tree?

And swimming in the creek?

Ol’ Betsy became our bed that night.

Remember the stars?  Remember the quiet?

Remember the haunted house and the apple tree?

Remember the screech owl we couldn’t see?

We were convinced it was a mountain lion!

Remember sleeping on the floor,

As down the road Ol’ Betsy roared?

Remember smells of oil?

Of windshield wipers flapping?

And Ol’ Betsy’s headlights shining down the road

Showing Daddy which way to go?

Do you remember these things, Brother?

Or have you gotten much too old?

Ol’ Betsy and you are the same age, you know!

Remember your dear, sweet, YOUNGER sister?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BROTHER!  I LOVE YOU!

February 26, 1996 (c)

Four-yr-old David in his peddle car next to Ol' Betsy

God's Precious Gift

God’s Precious Gift

When he was born, I couldn’t take my eyes off him.

His tiny hand clutched my finger and my heart swelled with pride.

It was hard to believe he came from me, and I was afraid.

I watched him grow, and I marveled at the things he’d done.

He would be all I couldn’t be . . . he could be President of this great country.

I still couldn’t believe he came from me, and I was afraid.

My love for this child as he grew to a man multiplied over the years.

Through all the pains of adolescence and all the mistakes of motherhood,

Of one thing he was certain, I loved him very much . . . even though I was afraid.

Francene Hopkins

9-22-95